Bismillah hir Rahman nir Rahim



I have not written anything here since my in-laws came in November. My mother-in-law went to CT to stay with my sister-in-law at the beginning of December and, alhumdulillah, had a healthy baby girl five days later. My father-in-law went to CT a month later. Meanwhile my husband's brother has moved in "indefinitely" and is sleeping on the couch. As a annoyed as I am about that, he is, at least, good with the baby. Ami and Abu came back at the beginning of February and will be going bacl to Bahrain next week. It has been a bit disruptive to our routine, but our routine was not exactly terrific. It is crouded, though.



My in-laws definitely have a HUGE generation gap. Ami and Abu are still stuck in their old Pakistani ways while all three of their children are so Westernized, it's like they are total strangers. Breakfast has to be so-so, omellete loaded with veggies, four slices of bread, and chai. Dinner is cooked as soon as you finish breakfast, you sit around and wait for the entire family to come before you eat dinner, which is a nice gesture but usually everyone is not home till 10:00, meanwhile no one has eaten since breakfast and the food is all cold. When you sneeze you give it all you got, warning no one. I have been so startled of Abu's sneezes sometimes I had to sit for a minute to calm down, then felt angry about it for the next hour or so. It seems to be quite alright to rest your feet on the coffee table, which is the table they eat their meals on. When making wudu, you should throw water all over the room. when you return from shopping everyone must sit in a circle to admire the purchases. If you don't praise every little thing it means you do not like it. Every little movement seems to have purpose, even just getting ready for a walk in the park or a drive around the city can take hours.



I try to keep my mouth shut and do not scoff or belittle or try question anything they do, unless it's really bizarre, and then I ask my husband about it. I don't want them to think that I am better than they are, of course I am not. I think they are a bit old fashioned and very "innocent" and naive. Everything is good or bad, black or white. Technology is way beyond them so they avoid it most of the time. My husband and bro-in-law tease them a lot, I think they should just let most of it go and not snort and snicker at some of the things they do or say, just let them be themselves. As long as they aren't getting robbed or taken in by some crook, let it be.



I do wish they would STOP shopping at Macy's every single day! WHY?!?!? They have NO MONEY for shopping at Mcy's and we have plenty of outlet stores with much better prices for the same clothes, on is practically right across the street. That one is just so beyond my scope of thinking, it really gets on my nerves that they think theya re getting good deals by buying a sweater for $50 just becasue the sign says it was 50% off. IT'S STILL $50!!!! If you live in the Persian Gulf or in Pakistan, why are you buying sweaters anyway? You might need a sweater or two for about a month in either place, why buy them for $50 or more, just because it says SAVE XX% on the sign. In my mind saving 50% is not saving anything if you are still paying $60. Save %100 and go to Ross.

Brother is here!

Just a quick note while the baby is asleep.

Brother and his family are here. I have been wearing hijab the whole and no one has said a thing about it, mashAllah everything is cool. Even little Skylar hasn't asked what's that all about. That is a surprise, and I doubt anyone discussed it and tried to explain it to them or to her before they came. I have been sending pictures of myself in hijab and posting them on my websites for the past year so everyone gets used to it. Maybe that worked.

My brother and his wife were one day from finalizing their divorce a few weeks ago, when they decided, literally in the eleventh hour, to try to work it out. Which I think is a good decision, they have a daughter to think about (my brother adopted her, but she knows him only as DADDY)...BUT, I see the same strains on his face. After the seperation, he was finally geting bck to his old self (I won't go into the details of their problems) and moving on with his life. I hope the old problems don't come back, but I really don't see much difference. I don't know how their home life has been these past few weeks, I know some changes have been made, and they need more time to get to where they want to be. But I see a long road ahead, and I hope it is worth it.

I am enjoying having my brother around, but I hope that next time...he can come alone. (Notice i said BROTHER only.) But that ain't gonna happen, I'm sure. Right now they went out without me to go shopping. Apparently, she did not want to have to worry about the baby needing to come home too soon and not being able to stay out as long as she wanted. I had not noticed that he was holding her back, and we live right int he middle of the shopping district, even if we did have to come home, it's not like we would have far to go. So I gave them directions and sent them out to an area where she had seen a few places she wanted to go to. Baby is still sleeping, so I guess it's not a big deal. I have no plans to buy anything, I am not a big shopper. But we had planned on going to the zoo, I think maybe she didn't want to waste a whole day at the zoo (which had been my brother's plan all along.) Well, it closes at 7:00, we'll see if we still have time. They just ran off and she didn't even say bye or nothing.

They are my guests so i am keeping my mouth shut. I would have liked to get out of the house, but this is their very short trip to a big city (which by the way, I don't think she has adjusted to very well, she says "country" things a bit too loud), let them do what they want. but my husband is going to be PISSED when he finds out they left me at home to go shopping. He really likes my brother, and has never really liked her.