Despite what most Yankees think of Texas, it is not entirely an extremist Christian state. Within Dallas, Houston and even San Antonio and Austin, you will find large non-Christian communities, most of which have either adapted to or have been accepted with few problems. The Houston Muslim community is one of the largest Muslim communities in the entire country, let alone the state of Texas. As for myself, personally, I can honestly say I have never had a problem wearing my hijab in Houston. I don't wear abaya or jilbob very often, but when I do, I don't notice anything from anyone because there are several women who wear it all the time.
Of course, once you venture out of the big city, you are a bit a vulnerable. I have driven across eastern Texas to Arkansas wearing my hijab several times. Once we leave Houston metro area, I get nervous. And once we hit the state line...
I have not yet worn my hijab publicly in small town Arkansas. This is a weakness in my iman. I don't know if it's so much weakness of faith as it is so much weakness of courage. I am scared of being the center of attention in this small town. Many people remember me or know my family and I am afraid they will by embarrassed to be seen with me. I especially think about my brother's reaction. He has never seen me wear it (or, not in many many years and he did not like it or understand it.) My parents see me wear it when they come to visit me in Houston. They have said nothing. But so far I have not had the courage to wear it while in Arkansas.
The last time we went there, I wore it the whole trip, right up to their front door. They live off the highway, so I can freely take it off while at their house. But I took it off before I went inside. And didn't put it back on till we were well on our way. (Well, it was dark, I sometimes take it off in the car if it's dark.)
My brother is supposed to come in a few weeks. I will not stop wearing it while he is here. I have no fear wearing it here, it's just back home that I get scared. It's the biggest obstacle I have in my life right now, this anxiety about wearing hijab in Arkansas has held me back for years. When my parents came for the birth of my son, and I wore it for the first time in front of them, they proabaly said nothing because of my fragile state of mind. (And, boy, was it fragile!) And since then, they have come a few more times and I resolutely wore it, no discussion, no problem.
I have no idea if it is all in my head or if they would really be embarrassed or if they would be supportive or proud of the fact that I was brave enough to wear it there. I have no idea if they would have anything to say at all.
Bismillah hir Rahman nir Rahim
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2 comments:
LOL, Typo errors!
Assalamu Alaikum Sis,
Believe me I can remember when I first started to wear mine. I have lived in my community for a few years before deciding to come to Islam and once I did; I had made the decision to wear Hijab full time. But ohhh the obstacles. It wasn't even really the fact that my job was trying to figure it out but it was the people. Where I live it's 99.0 percent Baptist and it's a pretty large community so that 0.9 percent was a huge culture and religious shock to them for never seeing it before. So it was not only hard to get people adapted to it but just dealing with people in general. But May Allah (swt) reward you for everyday you strive and struggle to follow in His commandments sis. Now 2 years later; it's almost becoming a fashion statement here; even the Muslimah's who live here and who never wore it out before wear them now, Al-Hamdulillah. Just continue to press on and the rewards will be great. Many Hugs sis! ;o)
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