Next Step?

Bismillah...

I walked to the mall, took 20 minutes. I didn't spend any money, just wanted to get out of the house instead of sit at home on Eid, doing nothing. Except for sore feet, it was enjoyable. I always get lost in that mall and they don't have any entrance ramps for the baby's stroller on the street that I was on.

That anonymous commentor who did not like the book The Ideal Muslimah (which, by the way, I never said I was implimenting at this time) got me interested in Salafi-ism, is that even a word? Salafi belief. I am not interested in being a Salafi, I don't think I am quite there yet. I just want to see what they are about. I do feel that I need to do more than just pray and wear hijab. I still do not wear hijab while in Arkansas. I still can not find the words to explain Islam to my Christian family. It all makes so much sense to me, I love Islam and I think it is a beautiful way of life, why can't I find the words to describe it to others? I get so tongue tied. and I feel so conflicted about the hijab thing. but this last time i was there I did pray all my prayers, first time I ever did that. Basically, I want to move on from just the basic stuff and represent myself as a stronger believer, I just have so many things holding me back.

I did read a khutbah by a Salafi imam, about women should stay in the house and only come out when there is a necessity. Boo...I can agree that it is better for the children if their own mother is able to stay home while they are young, not always inside, but there to raise her kids, but here in the States, one income families rarely survive. Sad fact of our society. Alhumdulillah, for the past year we have been able to do that, but it has been hard and stressful at times. But I would go crazy if I had to stay in the house and never leave, if only to get some air.

I do not think that niqab is fard and I do not think that women should never go outside the house and I don't think that all women are fitnah and I don't think women should bare the sloe responciblity of protecting men from fitnah, they are also commanded in the Qur'an to lower their gaze, it's not always the woman's fault he some stupid man chooses not to do so. I have only seen a few Salafi sites, some negative, some possitive. I don't have time to find the addresses right now, will have to update this post later.